Omega House and the Circle of Life - Lake Superior Caregivers

?Raymond Weglarz RN, Director of Community and Donor Relations ? Omega House

For many years I viewed life as a long and winding road, birth being the starting point and far off in the distance at the other end, death. As long as I didn?t see or think about the end of the line, I could convince myself that death is something that happens to other people. I would tell myself when I was young that death happens to ?old people,? or to those ?who didn?t take good enough care of themselves.?

?

In my early 20?s I became a registered nurse, and in mid 30?s I began working as a nurse in hospice care. Over the next 17 years I came to know and work with hundreds of individuals and families who were experiencing the dying process and death of a loved one. I saw first hand how death happens to more people than I had imagined. Rich and poor, young and old, those who took poor care of themselves and those who took exceedingly good care of themselves, all were dying. Many people I cared for were dying in spite of the very best medical care, the love and support from their families and deep faith.

?

I recall being upset with how unfair it seemed that people so young, so caring, or so needed by their families were dying. For a period of time I asked every minister and clergy person I could find one simple question: ?Why would God allow this to happen to such good people?? The simplest yet most profound answer I heard to this question was from the Tibetan Buddhist Lama, Sogyal Rinpoche, who said, ?Because life is like that.? It took me a long time to understand and accept this answer. My view of death began to change because I could no longer pretend it happened to just certain kinds of people. It also changed as a result of caring for my own mother, Virginia.

?

In her late 60?s my mother became blind from complications of diabetes and could not live alone after my father died. For her last 20 years she spent much of her time living with my wife Viki and me in our Keweenaw home. As she aged she became increasingly dependent and needed help with the most basic things. In her final years she needed our help with bathing, feeding, grooming, mobility, and even to help understand what was going on around her.

?

This was a challenging time, balancing the responsibilities of work, marriage and raising our four daughters, and helping care for Virginia. At times it seemed overwhelming. Yet it was also a rich time for our family. Caring for Virginia at times I had the realization, ?life has come full circle.?

?

While providing care for her, some times forgotten memories from childhood were awakened. I recalled sitting in a wooden high chair, with painted rabbits on it, and my mother spoon feeding me poached eggs. I recalled times when I was small, sick and afraid and her comforting me. I recalled asking God to protect her as I went to sleep not knowing how I could survive without her.

?

Reflecting on these things as an adult, a sense of gratitude and compassion for her, and everyone growing old and needing help was kindled. With this, a new found sense of responsibility emerged. I said privately to the universe, ?I will do whatever I can to help my mother and others like her receive care and support when they are dependent and dying.? This motivated me to begin working with a group of volunteers on a new project, one that would become the Omega House.

?

I now view life as a circle and realize too that death is necessary for that circle to be whole and complete. Our needs at the start of life and at the end of life are more similar than different. They include being cared for when we are vulnerable and dependant, to have assistance to meet our most basic needs, to eat and sleep when we feel like it, to be touched gently and treated with respect. Both coming into this world and preparing to leave, these things are what really matter the most. I feel blessed to have seen first hand how Omega House and hospice helps meet the needs of those at the end of life and their families. Even though my mother died just months before Omega House opened its doors, it brings me joy to know her caring example was one of many inspirations that helped bring Omega House to life in our community.

?

Ray Weglarz is a friend of Dr. Larry Skindzel and a registered nurse who worked as the hospice program manager at Keweenaw Home Nursing & Hospice for 17 years. Ray served on the board of directors for Omega House for 10 years before becoming the Development Director for Omega House?in April of 2012.

?

Ray welcomes comments and feedback and can be reached at Omega House by calling 906-482-4438 or by email at ray.weglarz@omega-house.org

Source: http://lakesuperiorcaregivers.com/omega-house-and-the-circle-of-life-by-ray-weglarz-rn/

johan santana viktor bout ncaa hockey role models ferdinand porsche gregg williams theraflu